1) At the age of four, our oldest, Bubba, saw me after i just got out of the shower and says “Mommy why is your penis so small?” Dear lord, are you serious? I explained that girls and boys are different and thought we were done. But then he asks, “Well what is yours called then?” All I could come up with was, “Umm, ahh, well its my private part.” I know, that’s pretty lame but I was pushed into a corner and wasn’t prepared people.
2) At the age of three, our second son, Pooh, says to daddy, “Hey daddy, maybe some day mommy will grow a penis like us.”
3) Only just a couple of months ago, Peanut was just 2 months old and I still had a bit of a pouch. Bubba says to me, “Mommy are you having another baby?” I respond with, “No sweetie, peanut will be our last baby, why do you ask?” His answer, as he rubbed my belly was, “Mommy you still have a baby bump, I thought you were having another baby.” Thanks Bubba, point taken!
4) My mother lives on the river and has a well. We were explaining to the boys that we can’t use water slides being it will use up to much well water. Pooh asked what a well was and Bubba answered, “I know what a well is. You throw money down them and make a wish.”
5) Just yesterday I was in the checkout line at our local grocery store. As I’m waiting for the cashier to finish with my items, my 2 year old grabs both of my boobs out of no where and proceeds to laugh hysterically. Really!
6) After my 6 year old was sent to his room for time out, my four year old sees him come back down stairs. He then says to me, “Mom here comes cranky pants. If he messed up my room I’m going to be angry with him, very angry. If I go up there and see it I’m going to have to spank his tushy.”
7) After seeing a bunny hopping around the front yard, PK said he wanted a pet bunny. I told him no because I din’t want it peeing and pooping around the house. He then said, “Mommy I want a pet chicken. Chickens don’t pee or poop. They lay eggs.”
I could go on forever. But I’ll stop here. I swear I have more good ones but I just can’t remember them. I’ll blame it on Mommy Brain for now.
Now it’s your turn. What have your kids said or done that has been totally unexpected and funny or simply not appropriate?